Resonance

Being Alone vs Being Lonely

A conversation between Emmanuel Bugyei and I.

Me: Turns out there’s an epidemic of loneliness in the 21st century, ironically

Bugyei: But is it common with young adults?

Me: Yhup! Most people can only identify about 6 emotions so the rest go unnoticed. Truth is, there’s not a single moment that we’re not experiencing one emotion or another.

That means people sometimes attribute sadness, grief, apathy, hunger, destitution and many others to loneliness when it isn’t always the case or vice versa.

Bugyei: So what does it mean to be lonely?

Me: It’s a feeling of void, emptiness, isolation. What sets loneliness apart is that it stems from lost or unformed relationships, basically human interaction.

We’re emotional beings who need intimacy, love and attention. When we’re underfed on these, we begin to feel lonely.

Bugyei: So the problem is not with the lonely person (the victim) but the object of his need.

Me: Exactly! That’s the underlying problem of the problem. Little acts of rejection hits us hard in the chest, and sometimes we don’t notice our own selves trying so hard to belong.

That’s why it’s good to show little acts of kindness to people. They NEED it, even if they don’t know that they need it. It’s a necessity good.

Bugyei: Well, a simple hello can help heal the heart.

Me: Sometimes a sincere word of kindness too does it.

I love you

…to be continued

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